Shoes and Silliness

I was not super ambitious for the day after PT (physical therapy) so I called my Mom to come over and help with laundry. Poor woman is always at my house moving laundry or bathing babies these days. While we waited for my mom I played with Riley. She put a person at the little piano of the doll house and sang "La, la, la" and then clapped for herself and then she had a great idea. She took the Polar Bear from her zoo and put him on the doll house potty and make a peeing noise. I told her that potty training the zoo animals was a brilliant plan!  It'll make for a very clean zoo. Silly girl. We got right to work when my mom arrived and soon it was Riley's nap time.

One of my greatest ambitions these days is to put on my own shoes, oh how my life has changed. It seems I mirror the toddler a lot hobbling around wishing I could dress myself. I asked at PT what I could do to work towards putting on my own shoes. He said get shoes with elastic instead of laces, a long shoe horn and stretch those hips as much as you can. Mike had already been on my case about my worn out shoes. I have that mom issue where I have trouble getting around to my needs at all. Mike and I discussed a budget for my shoes and he made me promise not to go by cheap shoes this time.

I had a mission: good supportive shoes with elastic instead of laces for $60 or less. Unfortunately this meant (gulp) the mall. With my mom on board for the adventure and a freshly napped little shoe expert in tow we hit the mall. I told myself I would get shoes and get out. It took 5 or 6 stores of being looked at like I was nuts before I found one that had what I needed.



I have trouble finding shoes because I wear a kids size and sometimes they're too ridiculous. I liked these because they had  lots of greens and blues and a little sparkle. Plus they're called "Sporty Shorties." With my original mission accomplished under budget I broke my promise to myself and went to look at Children's Place. Riley was being so sweet after being dragged (I was in my wheelchair with her in my lap) all over the mall looking for my shoes that I had to. She picked out a beautiful pair of pink eyelet shoes with sparkles on the toes and I got her some things from the clearance rack. After that I decided to spend the remainder of my shoe budget on some new shirts.

I've never struggled with my body image the way I have been since I stopped breast feeding, I loved the "nursing reserve" weight and my ability to fill a Dcup. Those things have gone now and I feel ugly. Scrawny and flat chested. Worse than flat I feel like I'm carrying around deflated balloons. I decided part of my problem is how stretched out all my favorite shirts are from pregnancy and nursing. So off I went on the road, hopefully, to looking in the mirror without wanting to cry. I picked out four new shirts appropriately sized for my body pre-pregnancy.

When we were done at the mall I was exhausted so I swung around the corner to a friend's house and put Riley down in the pack and play. We were both rested we visited with our friends and then headed home. After such a long day I decided to give Riley a little naked time. She was immeasurably pleased and simply ran from one side of the living to the other laughing for most of it.

At some point Isaac noticed and said "Riley!!! Where are your pants?!? I see your little butt." I explained she was having naked time to which he replied "Oh, man. I wish I could have naked time!" I explained that he spent a vast majority of his first 3yrs naked (probably should have said 5) . I told him he had more naked time than any kid I knew. He looked like he was searching his memory for this magical time so I offered to show he some video. He declined.