A Family Affair

It's crossed my mind more than a few times how grateful I am that my kids will be at the wedding. I fell into motherhood mid-stream with Isaac and it's a lovely idea to choose each other again. When we started planning the wedding he was ring bearer age and now he's a groomsman. He's growing up so fast! In typical boy fashion his mind is in his stomach, it's all about the food. He's most excited for the "biggest cake" he's "ever seen!". Also, to show of his dance moves, I'm sure.

Riley is such a girlie girl the whole idea of a wedding is magical to her. That's my wedding dress she peaking out from. Her face lights up when she talks about her pretty dress and her flower crown. She loved seeing me in my dress after the hair trial. She said I had "princess hair". It's absolutely adorable how excited she is.

I think it makes every already intimate, meaningful, memorable thing that much more so. I am vowing to love Mike forever in front of the most important people in my life, my kids. It's a big deal. I used to be sad that we had done it all out of order, but now I feel blessed. It was the timing that was right for us. It's such a gift to have pregnancy and infancy behind me. It's an amazing thing to have my two big kids with me on such a special day.

I don't envy the young newly weds who have know idea what lays ahead. I love that we are a functional family unit and we're promising to keep on, keeping on. It's such a nice feeling.

Baby Showers & Diaper Cakes

When you're never having another baby everyone around you picks up the slack. I have two baby showers this week. Two. The first is for one of Riley's dance teachers. She's having a little girl. D. and I got all excited to do a diaper cake in the colors of the baby's nursery. We were thinking something like this.

We gathered some small baby items and outfits. Then we scheduled a nap time diaper rolling/assembly session. By the time I arrived at her house I was knackered! So we discussed it and threw the items into a cute gift bag instead. The best of intentions...

When we got to the shower there was a super simple diaper cake or more accurately diaper bundle. Something like:

Only the one we saw had the wipes box on the bottom, rolled diapers on top and a baby blanket tied around the whole thing. It was cute and simple. I was kicking myself for not trying something like that. The shower was brief, but exciting. The girls will miss their teacher (she's one of three). Now, I'm chomping at the bit to give this diaper cake thing another go. The baby shower for one of my mommy friends this weekend, however, is no gifts. Boo!

It's her second baby so she's asked people to make a charitable donation instead. It's very big of her, but I was just explaining that when women get excited about something they shop. "Oh? A baby!! Look out Target." It's fun. I don't get all the hype about not having more than one shower either. Every baby should be celebrated equally. Although, baby stuff does accumulate quicker than anything else on the planet. Anyway, there's more impending showers on the horizon so I'll be cooking up the best diaper arrangement until then.

Mother Of Two

I will make two meals for the three other members of my family before it occurs to me to eat. I will meticulously dress my daughter and leave the house in the clothes I slept in. I will re-organize the play kitchen approximately 1,000 times before I ever get around to re-organizing the actual kitchen. I will read 10,000 books to the kids before I finish one of my own. I will set out to buy a new article of clothing for myself and buy outfits/shoes for the kids every time.

I will hear about everyone's day and then type my thoughts into a blog post. I will supervise both kids' tooth brushing and be too tired to walk back to the bathroom one more time. I will burst into tears over shoes in the doorway again. I will be gleeful about the amazing new non-stick pan. I will spend a month designing and hand crafting invitations for 2yr olds. I will know every Laurie Berkner song ever composed and not recognize a single song on the radio in over an hour.

I will feel guilt for perceived judgment when I don't get everything I intend to do done in a day. I will feel insecure around other moms on the playground. I will look forward to a trip to Target all week. I will spend a year going to the local library and never see anything outside the kids section. I will refer to my mom as Grandma even when there are no children present. I will worry more about my son's school work than he does. I will imagine being an emptynester every day and than cry every day of their 18th year(s).

I will consider watching a TV show with my co-parent "quality time". I will be more likely to find finger puppets in my purse than lip gloss. I will consider yelling at my GPS an adult conversation. I will continue to witness behavior in my children, remember doing it to my parents and be sorry. I will treasure the moments I occasionally resent. I will take 3,000 pictures of the kids before I ask someone to take one of me.

I have two kids.

Home Exercise Program

It's called being a mom. I'm up by 7:00am everyday (not weekdays, everyday). I get up and start moving. No slinking out of bed and shuffling to the kitchen to sip coffee. From the first little pitter patter of Riley's feet I'm moving. First some bending and stretching during “put the toddler on the potty”. Than standing and reaching during the “making breakfast”. Than a quick rest while she eats. Then bending and reaching for the “gathering of clothes”. A lot of aerobic exercise getting her dressed and even more of it finagling into my clothes.

Standing at the sink doing dishes I shift my weight a handful of times to make sure I'm not favoring the "good side." Dishes and counter cleaning is all about endurance and balance. Picking up toys and entertaining Riley raises the heart rate. Nap time is the cool down for round two.

After nap is a brisk jog down hill. A literal walk to meet Isaac after school. Some juggling the kids' needs for dexterity. Dinner prep and sometimes some writing time for brain flexing. Then the energy runs out, you refill and it's the triathlon of bath, bed and last chores. Then collapse into bed so you can repeat exercises tomorrow (plus actual physical therapy, grocery shopping, returning library books,etc...)

Baby Riley Stories

Riley adores my maternity pictures which are framed in the hallway. She points to them and gleefully announces "that's Riley in the belly." Then she points the framed picture taken right after she was born and say "When Riley came out of the belly!" Today she asked where daddy was in the pictures. I got out the belly book and showed her all the belly pictures so she could see the ones with daddy.

After we'd looked at the belly book three times Riley wanted to see baby Riley pictures. She loved the picture of Daddy saying hello to her for the first time. She patted and hugged pictures of herself, it was adorable. I told her about the special lights she had to lay on for a few days when she was tiny. I told her how much she loved to take a bath.

I told her about her first Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas. I told her how hair used to make her laugh and laugh. I told her about when she met her best friend. I told her about learning to walk and her first birthday party.

When she'd had her fill of stories about herself I hugged her and told her how much I love my big girl. I think next time she wants baby Riley stories I'll just scroll through blog posts. She's such a good audience. I'm glad I took so many pictures.

My "Gym"

The membership is steep, but unlike most gyms they usually kick you out rather than sign you to year long contracts. The members are typically older, although there is an occasional young athlete. No one gets hit on here, except maybe the receptionist. Everyone has a "personal trainer." The handicapped spaces are always taken. You have to make appointments to come work out.

Yes, physical therapy is going well. I'm less sore every time with the exception of last Friday. I still get really tired after my sessions though. Although it must be decreasing because before I'd collapse into my wheelchair the minute I got through the door (and stay there for the rest of the day) and now I lay down to rest for a bit, but stick with crutches mostly. Those damn crutches...I don't foresee not needing them in the next 25 days certainly, but maybe by summer? Who knows.

I've got to get the stupid pink stickers off, stat. My mom and the make-up artist had a whole discussion about wrapping them in ribbon, tulle, etc...Ugh. I'm leaning toward stripping them of the hot pink stickers, cleaning them and leaving them white. Although my wedding dress isn't white and according to the tux rental guy white next to ivory makes it look "dirty"

All "accessories” aside, I have been busting my hump and I will look beautiful in that dress. I'm back to my pre-surgery weight and feeling pretty good.

Putting The STAY Back in Stay At Home Mom

We've had plans, appointments, visitors and errands for what seems like months. My head was spinning last night like the old fashion merry-go-round things you have to run to start. I told Mike my entire plan for today, in the interest of saving gas and sanity, was to stay home. It was a good plan.

I'm run down from all the run around lately. I didn't do my usual lengthy list of things to do since we weren't going anywhere. I let Riley have complete freedom to pick out her clothes. I stayed in my pajamas. We had breakfast and played blocks. I wrote some thank you cards, sent some emails, wrote some blogs. Riley trashed the living room and I let her. I shared a brownie with her before lunch.

After lunch Riley and I read One Fish, Two Fish. While she napped I laid down and watched garbage tv. Then Riley and I watched Beauty and the Beast and Isaac got started on homework. I made the signs for the backs of our chairs at the wedding.

After Isaac's homework was done I watched the kids run around the back yard together. When it was too dark to run anymore we had frozen pizza for dinner. Mission Accomplished.

Tomorrow I have 9am physical therapy, a house to clean, laundry to start, kitchen surfaces to attend to and a nine year old with a long weekend.

Riley Moved In To The Time Out Corner

What happened? I had a smiley, sweet girl this morning. This evening I am bone tired and my head aches. Now Riley is uncharacteristically grumpy. Grumpelstiltiskin, pitching a fit while playing playdough?!? Un-be-lievable. Throwing toys at Grandma? Come on. Really? Refusing to put toys in a bag (her favorite activity). She's so very, inescapably two this evening.

Throwing, kicking, fighting. Little Riley quite contrary. Her favorite phrase is "I don't want" with lots of extra syllables. She threw herself to the ground and pulled a lamp down inches from her head. She loves to throw garbage away it's her second most helpful activity after helping load the dryer. Tonight when she was asked to throw her banana peal away she chucked it right on the ground. Defiant little bugger.

Bath time was a nightmare too and she loves baths. She demanded to get out so I told her to sit down for a minute. She yelled "No!" in my face. I drained the tub wrapped her in a towel and ignored the crying heap on the bath mat. When she calmed down I explained how getting out was her bad choice.

We had a pleasant story time experience, which was a relief. As soon as we finished the book and I wished her good night the thrashing and screaming started. I assured her if she cried I'd shut the door. I asked if she'd rather look at a book quietly with the door open. She made the logical choice for once this evening.

Then, after multiple requests to clean his room were ignored, I caught Isaac with his feet up on his destroyed desk reading a book. I pointed out that his list of responsibilities clearly states "clean room" before "have a good time!". This list has existed for at least 2 years. Beyond that, he was warned about and punished for not picking up last night. So, today at 4pm he ignored my request, at 6:30 he ignored my plea to straighten up and come eat (or the first half at least) and now after he'd lost his computer he was lounging in his mess like he was on vacation?!?

His behavior at school today was poor so his sticker chart was looking skimpy tonight, as it was. I told him how disrespectful ignoring me was. Pointed out that he made the mess, he let it go several days and he ignored multiple opportunities to take care of it. So, it wasn't me he was mad at. I planted myself while he started putting the mound of books back on the shelf. His protested and I explained how trust works and how I really didn't want to sit there. He worked diligently for several minutes and then exploded in a fit of temper. I sent him to shower and adjust his attitude.

It worked he come out clean and calm. I sent him to work on the mess for the ten minutes before bed after he apologized. He has a big field trip tomorrow and no school Friday so the prospect of restricted privileges really overwhelmed him. Now they are quiet in their rooms and Mike has brownies in the oven. I may survive...

Dance Class Derailed

Riley's been going to dance class since the summer. It's a small class of two year olds and she loves it! It's once a week on Tuesday and she usually rides over with her buddy Boo. I'd been pre-surgical and then post-op for a long stretch of the time she's been going. So Boo's Mommy had been driving her and dropping her home afterward. I have awesome friends.

Almost as soon as I was able and up to driving again I started having therapy on Tuesdays. Intense tiring therapy. So, I became dependent on the arrangement even though it was never meant to be permanent. The first week they missed class was because they were both very ill. Then a few weeks later Riley and Boo circulated a memo about behaving so badly neither mother would permit them to go.

Last week Riley was on her best behavior all day. I dropped her at Boo's for dance class. Then I got a phone call that Boo's Mommy's keys were locked in the car. Oh, no! I was tired and in pain. I knew I was barely up for driving let alone taking two 2yrs anywhere by myself. Mike gets off work the same time her class starts so he was no help. I so wanted to be a hero, but my body is broken and my bones were tired. I sent Mike to fetch her when he was done working and she was a terrific sport about it. Her consolation prize was a trip to the grocery store, poor kid.

I felt horrible guilt about not once taking the girls. I was mad that I never do my therapy and rest. I always wreck myself completely. Overachiever plus adrenaline equals non functional Mommy. I couldn't even get my own kid to her dance class when she was so well behaved all day. Failure. Riley loves dance class so much and I love that it makes her so happy. I was in ballet when I was around her age, but it didn't last. I bet Riley will still be in years from now.

Today after I picked Riley up from Grandmas's after my therapy appointment she said, "I'm very concerned about dance class." I couldn't make this up! Those were her exact words. I promised her no matter what Mommy would get her there today. She said she was "(s)till concerned about dance class". I reassured her as best I could after missing two weeks in a row.

I took precautions and napped after we got home while Riley was sleeping. I knew I'd be able to take her if I needed to and also if I was prepared to it wasn't likely I'd need to. Sure enough we got our ballerinas to class on time. They did a great job tonight and earned lollipops from their teacher.

So you see, broken failed ballerinas with metal in their hips can still sire dancers. Isn't she adorable in her tutus?

Mommy Fudged It!

A while back now during a comical attempt to make Riley's bed, in a fit of frustration, I yelled "AAAAAHHH, Mommy Fudged it!! This sent Riley into hysterics. So, whenever I make a mistake around her she informs me "Mommy fudged it" with a big grin on her face. It's good that she knows I'm human and has a sense of humor about it.

It's normal for even the super-est of super moms to "fudge it" now and then. I've forgotten to send in permission slips and had to run them in the morning of the field trip and that sort of thing. I've failed to properly feed Riley before a visit with her Great Grandma and been sorry. The usual stuff. Been late, been lost, forgotten or failed to plan. Generally, though I'm pretty on the ball.

Today I really fudged it. It's Presidents Day. At least three adults asked me if Mike or Isaac was off for the holiday. Each time I was freshly shocked at the question. I think I muttered "Um, holiday? oh. I don't think so." Well, I checked Friday night and sure enough Isaac was off. Fine, no big deal.

Fast forward to this morning. Mike got up and dressed Riley and got ready for work. He's still driving my car to the office on Mondays. Mike went to the car to look for his phone and heard the crossing guard’s whistle. Oops. I looked it up again, go figure today is President's Day and they do have school, but they're off Friday.

I'm not sure whether I pulled up the wrong school year calendar or assumed the 24th was Monday, but I fudged it. Isaac was out of bed at the time he's normally already at school. It was chaos. He moves at the speed of light all the time, but when you tell him to hurry he's molasses' slower cousin. It's maddening.

Everyone survived my goof. They always seem to. Strange that a little boy who lives to correct people never argued when I mentioned his long weekend...busted. Tardies under the bridge I suppose.

Productivity & Preceived Pain

This weekend we worked on wedding stuff and completed the longest accident free streak for Riley in very recent history. Despite crying from hip pain and having some trouble sleeping it felt productive. We got the non-responders on the RSVPs down to single digits. It'll be thrilling when we hit zero, but that's pretty good. We made serious head way with Miss Riley and the potty. She's been dry all day! As she is very fond of saying: AAAAAAAAAAAA-Men!

I am looking forward to an end of the panic feeling that seizes me in waves lately. I'm assuming it's a side effect of too many balls in the air just now. When physical therapy and wedding planning are off my plate...well other things will replace them. I'm an overachiever I can't turn it off. I've been thinking alot about laying the groundwork for a career. What career? I'm narrowing it down, right now event planning and writing seem like possible options that would allow me to still spend most of my time with the kids.

This is all pure fantasy at this point, of course. I miss working and I have no idea when it will be physically possible again. Speaking of the physical limitations, I strained something big time on Friday. Ouch. It feels like I re-broke the bone, but I can and have been baring weight so it can't be a break. I really pushed it the whole rainy day Friday and by bedtime I was in pain. It didn't improve overnight as I expected and I was up on the crutches a good part of Saturday too. So, my fond hope is that all though I stayed in the chair today and it's pretty much the same it will be gone tomorrow.

They always ask before therapy sessions "any groin pain?" in a concerned tone and up until now I always said no. I'm pretty sure a weekend of groin pain is a bad sign. Grumble. In the meantime it's really hard for me to admit to pain so no one knows how bad off I've been.

Tonight when I tearfully admitted how bad it hurt Mike said the worst thing you can EVER say to me when I make such an admission. He said "Maybe it's in your head." I was shaking with anger as I explained the extremely logical reason why I knew the pain was real. Then he suggested if therapy on top of my day to day routine was too much I should stop going. Hmpft! (but also I'd LOVE to). Who knows, budget and distance cry out for no more copays and trips across town. I've done enough to have a solid home program now. The only thing I'd miss is having someone to stretch me. Maybe I will quit...I really don't know what's best for me anymore.

Rest assured though if Mike ever tells me pain is in my head again I will break his fingers and tell him the pain is in his head. Seriously, I told him once he's experienced 7yrs of chronic pain and has 21 surgeries under his belt he is welcome to posit any theory he wishes unsolicited, but until then I'm the expert.

Good healing thoughts directed at my hip friends. I really need my body on my side for a few weeks.

Back on Track

Well, (Knock on wood) I think we're back, potty-wise. Riley, had her last accident on Wednesday. I got a phone call because I hadn't sent spare clothes. When I opened her bag to take stock of what was in it I discovered I hadn't sent the bag of spare clothes with her since December. That's at least 4months of no accidents before this little spell. There were some missing clothes I'd been wondering about in there amongst jingle bells and a pink Santa hat. I added a few more articles of clothing for variety. I headed over and changed Riley's clothes. I left the bag with Mrs D for Friday.

I firmly believed if we were prepared for an accident there would not be one. It turns out there wasn't from Wednesday until now. Woo-Hoo!! We're back. Thank goodness. Go team. I love my big girl soooo much.

I don't remember if I shared this ditty before, but I've been singing it a lot lately. Usually I sing "Bring your body to the potty cuz it's..." and a sweet little toddler voice answers "potty time!!". I also do the voices of the princesses on her panties and ask her to "please keep me dry" or thank her for "keeping me dry". Here's hopping the rest of the weekend is as dry as the first half has been. It's a lesson of motherhood for sure: Take NOTHING for granted. That includes ability to consistantly use the potty.

And...Nobody Cares

It was a whirlwind of kids and hurrying this morning and then off to physical therapy. I live on the other side of town from therapy so I often try to think of other things I can accomplish in the area to make the most of the trip. It's pretty silly because without exception I am wrecked after therapy and barely make it home.

However, efficiency trumps logic for me every time. I was convinced I needed to run a series of errands to inform people I was getting married in a few weeks even though my name won't change. I had been anxious about there being any kind of financial, medical or other such loose ends. I worked my butt of at therapy. It was one of the most intense sessions to far. I think they get caught up in my enthusiasm and things escalate. I've been less sore post workout each time, but today was an exception.

I shuffled my tired bones to my mom's in the rain and convinced her to hit a drive thru for lunch and "keep me company on some errands". Once I had a belly full of McNuggets and fries I was sure we could knock out two of my biggies in an hour. Turns out I was almost right.

The first errand involved us getting there, walking in and discovering that they didn't care/need to know. It was five minutes tops. The second errand involved us impressively getting turned around despite the two GPS's between us. It was brief miscalculation though. Then I waited my turn to hear yet again that they do not care about my martial status at all. Huh. In the end it turned into a "while you're here let's make some updates/changes". I was there an hour in total.

I was wrecked between the wet weather, the PT and all the running around. Whoa. It started to feel like I'd re-broken my hip. It seems weird to me, in a society where everyone makes such a big deal about being legally married, that so little will change for us. All our names will stay the same, we won't move, we won't change the bank accounts or really anything about the daily routine. We will have to run out and get the marriage license squared away in about two weeks and there will be some health insurance changes, but that's it. Huh...

Back to Normal(ish)

Let me start by saying it has not been all Facebook and Netflix on the couch since my surgery in November, at all. In fact, I did not allow myself a "laying around period" post surgery this time. I got out of the hospital on Wednesday and on Friday night I through Isaac's 9th birthday party. Then that Saturday I went to a baby shower and so on...You're getting the picture. I tried to disrupt our "normal" as little as possible.

Riley goes to play with her friends 3 days a week. Those three days are supposed to be the day I rest and have quality time with Isaac. Instead, I drop Riley off and hit the ground running trying to squeeze as much productivity as is humanly possible into those few precious hours. Until two weeks ago therapy came to me and I was still cautiously weight bearing. Not anymore. I started out patient physical therapy two weeks ago. I was also told by the doctor "you're healed, go crazy."

To clarify healed means the bones knitted back together and I am in no danger of popping it out or re-breaking. It does not mean I'm back to my level of functioning pre-surgery. There's been a lot of atrophy and there was always weakness. Not to mention I have never had both hips in the sockets in 30yrs. I have to learn to walk closer to the way normal people do (at least as far as my hips go) it's been tricky.

I digress, I have in the last three days in (addition to cleaning, organizing, blogging, crafting, homework checking, entertaining, cooking. bathing, etc) started finally doing dishes and laundry without assistance! I know my life is soooo glamorous. We do not have a dishwasher so standing and hand washing dishes was a test of endurance, but I passed the other day. Although my laundry room is accessible by wheelchair there's no getting the clothes out of the washer without standing, reaching and a wee bit of climbing, but I did that too.

Did I mention I was tired? My dad who's also recovering from orthopedic surgery (he broke his leg) keeps asking me if I'm bored. I wish. No, actually I don't. This is better than bored, just tiring.

Mommy's Valentines Day

My post on Valentines Day was very Riley-centric so I thought I'd tell you how it went for me. Mike made his own flower arrangement. He bought plants from Home Depot, cut what he wanted and put the rest in the backyard to be planted. Which is very, Mike. When will he ever have time to put them in the ground? Anyway, they're perfectly lovely, aren't they? Spider mums, delphiniums, daisies, willow and some other things I've forgotten the names of.

He "ran out" to get them and almost two hours later wasn't home. I was dog tired from starting my day with a rigorous therapy session at 8am and now it was going on 8pm. I ordered my much anticipated heart pizzas.

They did not disappoint. Festive and fun as well as exceedingly easy with minimal clean up. I stayed awake waiting for Mike to finish perfecting his flower arrangement after the kids went to bed. Then he delivered them with a flourish and I applauded them. I demanded pictures as it was know late and I wanted to show off my flowers on Facebook too.

I put this image on his wall earlier in the day. Isn't it funny? Happy Mother of all pun inspiring holidays!

Happy Valetines Day!!!

My Little fashion plate. I blew it and let her wear her "Valentines Day Outfit" yeatserday so this one was pretty much her creation.

Head to toe: Pink felt monster barrette from Etsy, bright colored heart shirt with ruffled edges, pink tu-tu(ish) skirt and pink cowboy boots with tiny hearts on them. Happy Valentines Day, indeed I think she did Fancy Nancy Proud.

Handing out her valentines to her friends! Such a big girl. I took a year off from making all the kids shirts and nobody seemed to mind.

Enjoying her pink owl lollipop from Miss Boo! She also got pink puppy stickers from little E. We are so lucky to have such nice friends.

Happy Valentines Day!!

Make your own free digital slideshow

Thank you Miss D for taking the time to make this slideshow it's lovely!!

You're Welcome...

You're welcome family. You are welcome for the tidy house you all came home to after you left a messy one behind. You're welcome children for the Valentines I took the time to provide you. You're welcome for all the questions I answered today and for the example I led. You're welcome for putting you first. You're welcome for the homework help, the pee pee clean up, the bathes and the stories

This was a day I could have really used a thank you. Maybe tomorrow I'll race off to therapy before you're awake, return your library books and chauffeur you around without a second thought, but today...Today I got blank stares and defiance. I got ignored and criticized. You all came home in your own worlds and it never crossed your minds that all the laundry didn't do itself. Today you are kind and sweet as ever, but not grateful. Today I feel wrung out and tired.

You don't care about the things I did today. Only not doing them, would have been noticed. My head aches. I want to skip dinner and sleep. I want someone to put their arms around me and say "good job". That person doesn't live here today and perhaps I won't need them to tomorrow.

Riley's Valentines

Earlier in the month I cut the heart cards. Tonight I finished them for Riley to give out to her friends. Just so you know I'm not insane Isaac's classmates are receiving store bought Pixar Valentines. He's a boy and his class is 20 kids so that's absolutely the right choice for him. I suspect as long as Riley has 4 valentines to hand out and appreciates them so much I'll keep making them.

Materials

• Heart Cards (see link above)
• Glitter/Glittery stickers or foam letters
• Smaller foam/contruction paper hearts
• Flower stickers
• Red and Pink construction paper
• Edging scissors
• Glue stick
• Pretty tissue paper
• Raisin boxes

Cut a strip of red or pink paper to line the inside of the card. I alternated edging scissors to make them look fancier. Glue them down especially around the edges. Be sure to let them dry all the way before you fold the card.

Once the inside is dry fold the card. Make a defined fold so you can tell where you can start the writing on the front. Then flatten it again and decorate with your smaller hearts and glittery letters. Again, let the front dry completely before folding the card again.

Wrap your raisin boxes in the pretty tissue paper. Be careful to start low enough for the kids to be able to get into them. Add stickers and their names.

Then the real fun begins, thinking of cute raisin puns. Ours incuded: We go togehter like grapes and sunshine! and You always give me a "raisin" to smile. You could go on for days with those! So much fun.

All done, sitting in a pretty stack. I thought about attaching the raisins to the card, but decided against it. There were so few and I didn't want to damage the tissue paper. I do wish I'd secured the tissue paper on the bottom of the box to keep it from slipping down. Other than that I'll explain to Miss D that each card and each box has a name. Riley will be excited to pass them out.

Potty Training Regression

Nobody talks about this (or at least no one told me), but it really happens. I considered Riley fully potty trained as of September. We still had an accident here or there, but they were pretty rare. She did great for me, for grandma and usually for D. Side note: (some readers have expressed confusion on the subject) When I discussed daycare 5 days a week it was when I was being offered a work from home opportunity. That opportunity fell through shortly after. My friend D watches Riley part time as she did before. Which is necessary and helpful for a number of reasons. I digress. We had months of loveliness where everyone in the house used the potty.

Even though Riley was the only one of D's small group out of diapers she didn't seem to mind. I was ready to give away one of the little potties since it had been gathering dust in the bathroom. She was pulling her pants down climbing up on the big potty, wiping (I highly recommend the Kan Do flushable wipes in the pop up container) flushing and pulling her pants back up with almost no help. Yes, WAS. When her best buddy started potty training everything changed. Suddenly, she was having multiple accidents a day. Her excuses ranged from "oops" to "I didn't want to go on the potty".

I kept trying to remind myself how development isn't a straight line, but come on! No accidents for months and then three a day for a week!?! I had lots of accidents when I was a kid because I would hold it and then not be able to move quickly to the bathroom like the other kids. Riley is testing. She wants all the attention she got when she started potty training again.

I was frustrated, angry and scared that this has the potential to happen several times. Although maybe not as likely once the Boo and Roo gang are both on the potty trained side of things. The solution? You must start again. You go back to monitoring potty times extremely carefully (especially right after they wake from naps and over night) because you can't trust them. You bring back small rewards for successful potty use. Don't punish if you can help it, just let them miss out on the positive rewards and attention.

Hopefully, this is working and Riley will get back on track while her buddy gets more confident and we won't have any more potty training back slides. I suspect kids who spend regular time with friends and siblings are the most susceptible. Let's not forget the bed wetting phase to come. Isaac was wrapping that one up just as Riley was learning to use the potty the first time. Oh, also we make a HUGE deal of accident free days. Tonight Riley got green food coloring in her yogurt to celebrate.

The Cough

It had been Riley's only symptom for days. She'd been sleeping and eating just fine. No fever, no excessive fussing. She was otherwise herself just coughing. Maybe I raised a seriously tough cookie or maybe I'm getting wimpy in my old age. Either way her cough knocked me on my butt.

I started coughing on Tuesday, but I assumed it would be like it was for Riley. No big deal. I didn't sleep well that night and by the end of the day Wednesday I was wrecked. After some drowsy cough medicine and a good solid night of sleep I was no better.

In fact, I was worse. Mike got the kids up, dressed fed and out the door on his own. It's a rare event. Usually, I ask him to do it and stay in bed initially, but end up out of bed picking up the slack. Not today. Today, I laid in bed vaguely aware of what was happening drifting in and out of sleep. I didn't fully wake up until 9:30. Luckily for me Riley had been content to play quietly by herself and Mike hadn't needed to take any work calls. I felt awful. I took a hot shower with Riley got us dressed in some comfy clothes just in time for Mike to get on the phone and need us gone.

I took up residence on the couch and let Riley have her way with the living room. I used the wheelchair all day and managed to keep the kids fed and on their normal schedule. I assumed "taking it easy" would mean full recovery by Friday. I guess progress by inches is the most fitting description, but I feel that unit of measurement to be generous. I did manage to eat solid food by the afternoon. Previously, it had been milkshakes and cough medicine. I had pasta for lunch and then a burger for dinner.

The worst of it is the pain in my chest and back. There's stinging from the fluid in my lungs, but the soreness of the muscles and the continuous coughing is really bad. Mike's pretty annoyed by the coughing at this point too. I can't blame I was over it days ago. Oy. Anyway, when all else fails I set a goal and push. So, tomorrow morning it's out of bed, get the kids and myself ready and then we're off to a birthday lunch downtown. Don't worry I'll bring hand sanitizer and cough drops (and be feeling much better).

Photo Thursday

I've said it before and I'll say it again, I am so glad my partner in parenting can run and play with the kids. This was taken the other day in my backyard. Mike walked Riley down the zipline. If it were up to me we wouldn't have a zipline. I am certainly in no shape to climb a ladder and jump off sailing through the backyard. The kids, however, are. It is very much appreciated and stirct rules are observed so they can keep it. Hurray, for athletically able, child-at-heart Daddies.

Mommy's Birthday

See my birthday tiara? We put candles in donuts and sang. Clue number one that I was coming down with something was that I only ate Half a donut. Disturbing, I know. My toddler friends all sang and wished me a happy birthday despite not being able to count to my new age. It was a fun morning.

In the afternoon I went for my hair trial for the wedding!

Princess-y isn't it? Sigh. My awesome birthday present from Lara was a bridal session in the backyard while I had wedding hair. She took some beautiful shots. I especially love a picture she took of Riley admiring my dress. I really can't imagine a wedding without her.

I also got pages of Facebook wishes and some thoughtful cards. Mike replaced my broken car stereo. My dad gave me the Father the Bride movies. Isn't that sweet? I also got a bouquet with beautiful pink roses from one of my best friends, that was a great surprise. Aside from organizing the toddler party in the morning D also gave me chocolates and a gift certificate for a mani/pedi (squeal!!).

By bedtime I was completely run down and Mike was alarmed at my hacking cough so he rushed out for medicine. It was drowsy cold medicine and bed for me. Not a bad day all things considered. I was so worried about my birthday going unnoticed. It did (like any other day) involve some stress, but it was a good birthday.

Goodbye Twenties...

Yesterday Isaac was standing in the kitchen with his backpack on examining the calander.
Hey, Dad!
Yes, Isaac.
Next week is Valentines Day!!
Yes, but you know what happens before that, right?
Um..ah..
Mom's brithday.
Oh. But next week is Valentines Day!!

The end of my twenties is not even a blip on a 9yr old's radar (or anyone else's I suppose). I have some low key plans for tomorrow. With the wedding fast approaching and Mike's cousin expecting a new baby any minute it didn't make sense to make a big fuss. I've been making jokes about being old, but it wasn't until this morning when I wrote "last day of my twenties" that I really felt sad.

I know thirty isn't old and I'm sure being in my thirties will be great, but it's sad that a decade when so much happened is coming to a close. I graduated college in my twenties. I saw Ireland too. Then again I got hit by a bus in my twenties. I lived in New York City for a year, but I also had to move back home for a few months. I found a place I belonged in Los Angeles and even professional success there. I also fell apart and had 5 surgeries in my twenties. I become a mother to a 5yr old and later had a baby in my twenties.

I will miss and never forget my twenties. I will always be proud of all I accomplished and experienced over the last decade. I'm also sure after some reflection that moving on from them will be a good thing. Twenty nine years 364 days...

Dresser Drama

It always seems to be two steps forward and one step back, doesn't it? I was feeling all liberated yesterday. This morning I was supposed to sleep in a little and let Mike get the kids ready. The problem was I eventually needed to get dressed. At the moment there is a sandbags-on-the-shoreline style barricade arond my dresser. My poor dresser sits in close proximity to Mike's desk. Mike is a slob. The spillage gets out of control sometimes and the overflowing mess can potentially cut me off from half of my room.

Some days back it occurred to me that there was a simple answer. Instead of having drama and demanding he pick up or be on hand whenever I'm ready to get dressed , we just move the dresser. Ta-da! My problem solver powers are great. Unfortunately so are his powers of procrastination. Although we had a simple solution and it would only take him moments to execute it had not happened as of this morning.

I tried to stay asleep, but anxiety gripped me. I'd get up after he was gone to the office and attempt to climb over the piles to my dresser and hurt myself and no one would be there to meet Isaac after school. Worse physical therapy this week would be shot. I decided to get up and have Mike help me before he left. I picked out clothes for Riley and started dressing her while I waited for Mike to emerge. He came out of the bathroom grumpy and annoyed. He had to get my clothes in the middle of getting ready of work and the fact that they kids were now both ready was no consolation.

While he was sighing and retrieving my clothes I burst into tears. It wasn't my best moment, but I was sick of this shit! No girl should have to depend on a boy to pick out her clothes. I was tired and if I hadn't needed help I would have still been in bed. I got dressed and kissed the kids and laid down for another 30min before I started my busy day.

When I was putting Riley to bed tonight I heard Mike moving the dresser! It's such a relief to know my clothes will be accessible from now on. It's a microcosm of how I feel about my physical limitations. I don't have to run marathons I just want to dress myself. It's also, a microcosm for marriage: I could have yelled, screamed, cried and reasoned with Mike for who knows how long about keeping his mess away from my dresser, but in the end that's his workspace and he's a slob. I will never be happy being dependent on him for things I could do myself. So we move the dresser and don't expect anyone to be someone they're not.

A Little Running Around

I haven't run an errand by myself in a while. The surgery laid me up and prevented driving until recently. On top of varying levels of mobility Riley has been my shadow lately. I had intended to bring her with me to Target to pick up a few things after her nap. It turned out Mike had an urgent request with 30mins left until Riley's nap. I thought I'd still bring her for a quick drip, but she had a fit that included throwing a bowl of food. So, I left by myself.

It was strange. I remember similar feelings of freedom the first few times I went somewhere without her when she was a baby. I alternated between extreme pride at my independence and mobility and the feeling I'd forgotten an appendage. I walked into the store on my crutches, but I was tired from the party so I hopped on an electric cart. I zipped around gathering my items. It was strange not to have to entertain a toddler. My thoughts seemed louder.

I even ran into a mommy friend and had an uninterrupted conversation, whoa. Once my errand was complete I came home to a quiet house and worked on crafts projects until nap time ended. It was nice. I was happy to see madam cranky pants when she woke up. It's nice to have options again.

It's nice to run around by myself and equally nice to come home to the kids. I don't mind being home most of the time and I enjoy spending lots of time with kids. What I don't like is have no choices. Stir crazy doesn't really cover it. Little by little I'm getting out and about again, doing more around the house and feeling like myself again.

Park Party

The last of Riley's little group of friends turned two this weekend. I can not get over how much growing up has been going on right under my nose! It was a fabulous party and little Miss E the birthday girl had a fabulous time, can you tell?

it was my first solo birthday party since the hip surgery. I have an amazing group of friends and I wouldn't have occurred to me to worry, but it was a park party. You just never know what to expect with those (or with a two year-old). I'm not super mobile right now (nor have I ever been) so reading a shelter number on an invitation always makes me nervous.

I thought about using the wheelchair, but I knew loading and unloading aside the terrain would be unforgiving. Crutches it was. Riley insisted on her party dress, but having made that mistake before I added polka dot leggings ans sensible shoes so she could climb.

I got to the party early. I told myself, I could do this if I stayed tough. The last party we went to I was less healed and she got waaaaay away from me. Mike was there and after some yelling and arm waving he collected her. This time I was on my own...I scoped out the close proximity to the bathrooms and breathed a sigh of relief. Then before we could get out of the car E's Daddy was there asking if he could help.

I had him carry the present, but made Riley walk holding my fingers all the way to the shelter. The playground was right next to us. Not just that is was the little kid playground! Perfect. We hugged the birthday girl and went over to check it out. E's parents had scoped it all out before hand, way to go. They made an awesome mix of kids party music. They even had healthy party food: lots of fresh fruit, cheese, goldfish, pretzels raisins and craisins. Aside from the cake it was all good stuff. Riley tried yogurt covered raisins for the first time and LOVED them. She calls them candy raisins.

We successfully navigated the playground together, perched ourselves on a picnic table bench for a snack and even made a successful potty trip. At that point the kids and daddies hit the playground and I got to rest for a bit. Riley stayed close most of the afternoon and it wasn't until it was time to go that she discovered the big kid playground. In the end I enlisted help and lured her to the car with promises of more candy raisins.

It was an amazing afternoon. Good friends, great music and cute kids. I can't believe how they've grown. I knew these kids before they could crawl and now they walking, talking, dancing, bossing mommy around two year-olds.

Heart Cards

In my quest to find inspiration for thank you cards (we got our first two wedding gifts this week) I found these cute heart shaped cards in The DIY Bride: Crafty Countdown. She calls them "From the Heart Thank You Cards" and they seemed simple enough. Whether I'll use them for wedding thank you cards I'm not sure, but they make adorable valentines!

First, she requests you copy and enlarge her template:

Here's my template heart and note section

Here's what the heart looks like folded

An example of a finished one:

Once you get the template proportions right they're very simple. The decorating possibilities and uses are endless.

I Love Steve!!

Happy Groundhog's Day!!

Six more weeks of winter? Not here. This morning:
Isaac do you know what today is?
Thursday!
Yes, but what's happening today?
Gifted.
Yes and...
Parent teacher conference.
Yes and...
Trash day.
(Laughing) What's the date today?
February
It's Groundhog's Day, buddy.
(yelling excitedly)Groundhog's Day!!!!
Yeah I know how you feel about weather related holidays.
It's gonna be a good day.

Feel the Burn!

Today was the day I got down to the business of getting strong again. I got up and put on my work out clothes. I dropped my kids off and headed off to the other end of town. I psyched myself up by thinking of it this way "Don't most brides hit the gym twice a week before their big day?". Okay. I can do this. It will help me to get serious about bulking up. My mood will certainly improve and maybe I can lose the crutches for the wedding.

So, for like the thousandth time I started physical therapy. We started by warming up on the recumbent bike. First of all, I am the smallest adult size human to use that equipment. Second my foot kept sliding off the pedal even with the rubber strap tightened all the way. He ended up tying them on with therabands. At this point I discovered I am still incapable of pedaling all the way through, although I was hopeful. At least, I was incapable of it when pedaling the normal way. Instead I pedaled backwards with my feet tied to the pedals for 10mins.

We followed that up with stepping up and down with alternating feet. Way easier one side than the other. I did standing to sitting, side stepping up an incline (one side and then the other), leg lifts, crouching to standing against the wall, hip stretches and bridges. When I was done I was tired and sore, but remarkably still standing. I felt good. The endorphins were flowing and I felt accomplished. I felt invincible and hungry.

As the day wore on I ate to satiate my reinvigorated appetite and drank water like it was going out of style. By dinner it was time for Advil and an ice pack. The therapist warned me I'd reach the peak of soreness within 48hrs. From where I'm sitting just now, that's troubling.

I have a parent teacher conference to attend at 8:45am. I hope I can move in the morning. So, I'm going to ice my hip and watch Once Upon A Time and pray the inflammation goes down before morning.